The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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