it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Randomize
