he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
