Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
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