your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
25 Times Terrible Advice Was Given To A Teenager
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.