i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
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