wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Randomize
