24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..