Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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