He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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