You're completely useless in the revolution.
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
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I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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