I think my vagina is haunted
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
