brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
if you like me you must not know who I am
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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