I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Randomize
