How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
