I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
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