He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
