Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
its not stalking. its research.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
