If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I just want to make out with him forever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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