actually, I'm a sock model
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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