btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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