Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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