just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
i believe in u and ur pee
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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