its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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