420 ftw
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
