I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
