So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
