I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
