It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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