Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize