walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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