So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Randomize
