nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Randomize
