Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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