Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
