my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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