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• (805): View more from California

  someone threw a dead crab at me

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm home now. bring me food and boobies

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• (027): View more from

  I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge

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• (760): View more from California

  For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".

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  27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier

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• (313): View more from Michigan

  Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room

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• (406): View more from Montana

  I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina

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• (916): View more from California

  The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.

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  23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe

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• (425): View more from Washington

  What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?

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• (727): View more from Florida

  I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame

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• (845): View more from New York

  brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle

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• (618): View more from Illinois

  Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased

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• (573): View more from Missouri

  She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE

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