Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
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