Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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