summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
