i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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