so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I wish I only lived at night.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Randomize
