and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Randomize