I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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