Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize
