"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
