No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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