It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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