Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
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