She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
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