ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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