i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Randomize
